Category Archives: Family Matters

Going to the Ball! You know, like Cinderella.

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Tomorrow night I am going to The Ball. You’d think I’d be more excited.  Maybe it’s because I’m no longer a teenager, or that, being married, I can’t really expect to meet Prince Charming.  ‘Cause, that’d be awkward and all.

Actually, my daughter has been taking a Cotillion class and this Ball is the final event. Dinner and dancing.  Kiki gets to wear a lovely formal gown, new shoes, sparkly jewelry, and beforehand we are going to my sister’s house and she’s going to give her some sort of fancy up-do.  Me, I’m just wearing the one dress I own and a worn out pair of flats. Sigh. One of the crappy parts of being poor… and yet, it doesn’t really matter. Kiki is the one who ought to feel like a princess.  And hopefully she will.

Wait…. whoa! Stop! I’m not ready for this ride!

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My daughter has a boyfriend.

Okay, well, she has a boy who really likes her. Who calls her. Texts her.

She likes him back, but I suspect (and she admits) part of the reason she likes him is because he likes her and that feels kinda nice. He’s a classmate, and they’ve been friends for awhile now (she actually prefers the boys in her class because… well, because they aren’t like the girls! Petty, judgmental, fickle… if you’ve ever been or ever known a teenage girl you know what I’m talking about.)  However, he’s not the boy she’s been crushing on for the last year… (who is a church friend; doesn’t go to her school. And who does not seem to like her back…)

But. She’s 14. In the 8th grade. Too soon for a boyfriend.

It’s not like she can date or anything, and we (her, me, her dad) have had extensive talks on protecting her heart, and staying true to her beliefs and well, to be honest, regrets, and how not to have them. Still… she’s 14. I remember how I felt at 14… in fact, in my 8th grade year I was madly in love with a boy, and he with me. We made plans for our senior prom (yes, years away) and how many kids we would have one day – as if we had a clue! But we thought we did… and we did some serious kissing!! I am pretty much telling my daughter “do as I say not as I did”.   Because I know how the other end of it feels… all these years later I am still missing a little piece of my heart.

But, part of me thinks it’s cute, and sweet… so I am really torn on just how to proceed.  Do I monitor her calls? Read her texts? Leave her be?  I trust her, and I know her desire is to do the right thing. On the other hand, she can be a bit of a follower, and the few times she’s been in serious trouble it’s been because she’s allowed a friend to talk her into doing something that she knew darn well ahead of time she was not to do.  So, its a concern.

Oh, how I miss miss miss the days of toddlerhood! Even she said to me the other day “Why can’t I still be 5 years old? Life was so much easier then.”

How do you find yourself, once you become really, truly lost?

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This mire which is my so-called life has become murkier and deeper as of late. It feels as mucky as the early spring mud which sucked my boots right off my feet when I’d head out to the barn to feed the horses. (Not much is grosser than stepping ankle deep into slimy mud clad only in stockinged feet…) I feel trapped with no obvious way out. Don’t know which direction to head. How to even start.

Maybe some of this has to do with the fact that we have now been living with my parents for over a year and a half. It was supposed to be for about 6 months, maybe less. Worse, I see no immediate end to the situation. No way out. I need a full-time job, and how do you do that and homeschool your kid? Also, how do you get a decent full-time job when you haven’t really worked since your child was born, almost 15 years ago? Not to mention all the taxi-service I do for her…

Then there is my weight. Other than feeling bad about it, I am doing nothing at all. It is my addiction, to dull the pain. It hurts in the long run, but don’t all addictions work that way?

Then there is my child’s education. This past year at our co-op has worn me out. I don’t want to do it any longer. I don’t feel qualified to homeschool her completely on my own (we all know how that went over in Virginia) and I want her to at least somewhat enjoy her high school years, unlike me.

Oh, and my sister.  Ugh with the vegan-ism and the adorable outfits and the “ooh guess what we are getting a trip to Cancun this year” and oh-dear-lord what I wouldn’t give to have my little sister back so we could gripe about it together! No one else truly understands how much I can love my older sister yet hate her at that same time.

My husband is no help at all. He’s not doing anything bad, just so wrapped up in his own issues that I can’t get him to spend a moment at least trying to give me some help on mine.

I finally get why moms run away from home. Honestly, it’s all I can do some days not to just toss some stuff in a bag, hop in my car, and start driving. To – anywhere. If I had more than two nickels to rub together I’d probably go. Chances are pretty good that I’d eventually return… but maybe with my head on a little bit straighter.

I hate to admit this, but…. I like The Hunger Games. Books and the movie.

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My husband started reading the series as well. Got involved to the point that we didn’t want to wait to get the book from the library (I was about 200-something on the waiting list for book 2) so we ended up buying the boxed set of books.  Yeah. We are that crazy.  I ended up reading the last book in one day – I got so caught up in it – not to mention it’s pretty stressful to read – that I just wanted to be done! I liked books 2 and 3 better than the 1st; not sure if they’re better or if I was just hooked.

Then we went to see the movie. Opening night, midnight premier, of course.  With Kiki and friends all dressed up like characters from the books. Of course.

The movie is exhausting. The way they filmed it really sets the mood. I found it hard to watch, but good. Actually the book series was exhausting as well, in my opinion. Because it’s a really dark story.  But one that needs to be told. All in all, I’m glad I got sucked in.

Trying to re-read “The Hunger Games”. Still not loving it.

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The movie premier is next week (well, here in Idaho at least) and of course we already have our tickets (you know, ’cause it’s my daughter’s current obsession) so I thought maybe I would re-read the book. To see if I like it any better. After all, we watched the L.A. premier deal last night – that is, the actors showing up and getting interviewed (remember – obsession – ) and so many people went on and on about what a fabulous writer Suzanne Collins is… and I thought maybe I didn’t give the book a fair shake the first time around since I just am not thrilled with the whole premise of the story.

 Nope. So far I am pretty sure I was correct the first time around. Not that it’s not an interesting story…it is. I can see why teenagers like it (especially girls, since the heroine is a girl, and there is a romantic storyline in it) It’s just poorly written as far as I am concerned. Technically speaking, that is.  But I guess that doesn’t matter?

I am going to try to finish reading it before we go see the movie. Maybe. We’ll see.

Happily, blissfully alone. Unless you count the pack of hounds.

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One of the hardest things about living with extended family is that there is always someone around.  I like people, honest. But not every waking moment.  I need my alone time.  Badly.  And I haven’t had any in…. like a year.  Or two.  It’s a wonder I’m sane.   (some might say that point’s debatable)

This week we’ve been crashing with my sister and her family. No, we’re not trying to spread the love – my parents just decided this would be a lovely time to tear up the carpeting and put in hardwood floors instead. We have to be out of the house for the entire week while it’s getting done.  Well, the kids are at school, my husband’s at work, and my sis and her hubby have some errands to run. So, it’s just me and the dogs!  All four of them, (my sister’s two, my parents’ dog and mine) which is way too many for one house, lol. But I am all alone! Yay!!

UPDATE:  Well, that didn’t work out the way I’d hoped. I thought I’d have at least an hour and a half, but within 20 minutes my sister was home, happy that they’d gotten through their task quicker than expected. ~sigh~

Well, we’re back at home now and it’s smells like crazy in here. But the floors look beautiful, even if we do have to sit directly on them as we aren’t allowed to bring the furniture in yet.  Sheesh. Still, it’s good to be “home”… as home as it gets for us at this point.

Still, I wish I had a home of my own. And a little more time alone!

Sleigh Ride ~ Bogus Basin Outfitters, Boise Mountain Range, Idaho

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The road up was nasty, as I suspected… even nastier (quite icy) coming back down. Especially when the guy ahead of us stopped dead in the middle of the road (but I couldn’t get mad, ’cause he stopped for a deer who was considering crossing just then).

BUT! The ride was soooo fun!  We had a great time. It’s been awhile since we did something fun, so it was especially memorable.

The ride up as it started to get snowy…

This rock is known as “The Buffalo”… it’s a halfway marker point –

My windshield wiper froze up, so we couldn’t get the window clear –

The Nordic ski lodge, where we waited for the sleigh to arrive –

Brrrrr……

It was getting dark by the time we arrived at the little cabin, so I have my camera on a pretty long exposure time, and I am not good at holding still! So, these aren’t great pics, but give you an idea how it looked, anyway.

Looking out from the hot chocolate shack, where we had a nice wood fire and – well, hot chocolate!

Super, super fun! Everyone in our group enjoyed it; adults, teenagers, and the little ones. I highly recommend it!

Snow? Why today?

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This afternoon, since it’s a holiday, a group of us are going up to the ski mountain to take a ride in a horse-drawn sleigh.  The road up the hill is treacherous if it’s snowy, and full of hairpin curves. Not to worry though, as it’s been pretty much dry as a bone this winter. We’ve had the latest opening ever of the local ski resort, and the road has been dry pretty much the whole winter. Which is bad for a whole host of reasons, but makes for better driving, to be sure.

Until today. Today it is snowing like mad. Big, lovely flakes fluttering down. I’d be thrilled – if it wasn’t for my plans.  The snow isn’t really sticking here in the valley, but it’s most likely a different story up the hill.

IF we make it up there safe, I bet it will be a really pretty ride!

Then hopefully we make it back home safe, as well!

Having vegan friends is really a downer when it comes to parties

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So tomorrow is Super Bowl Sunday.  Sure, I have to work until 5pm (I am sooo annoyed about this – but that’s another story) but we thought it would be nice to invite some friends over to watch the game… then we started going down the list.  I have complained before how too many of our friends are also friends of my sister, right?  Friends who she has pulled over to the Dark Side known as “being vegan”. Anyhow, we were thinking of the snacks we wanted to make for the game – you know, the usual stuff; cheese dip with tortilla chips, little smokies in BBQ sauce, chip and dip, cookies. Crap food. Party food. Stuff most of our current friends won’t eat. Or, stuff that we’d feel guilty eating in front of them.  As my  husband said “they’d just think ‘gees, no wonder those two can’t lose any weight'”.  I am thinking that must mean the problem is… us.  Could it really be?? I suppose if we didn’t eat poorly we wouldn’t need to feel guilty about it. But, honestly, what kind of Super Bowl snacks do most people have?  Isn’t it fat-laden, meaty items? It’s not just us, right? 

It’s bad enough that the last two parties we’ve been to with this particular group of friends were full of vegan/not extremely tasty treats. Not horrible stuff, but not fantastic either. I guess I have two choices: become vegan myself, or make new friends. I wonder which choice would be more painful?

It’s done ~ my Paper Tree

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Well, on close inspection you can find plenty of flaws… pencil marks I can’t get erased, chunks and tears in the paper and foam core, and I even accidentally “pruned” a couple leaves off! However, at an ‘over all’ glance, it looks pretty decent. I hope my sis is happy with it.  I will try to get a couple pics tomorrow when it’s in use so you can see what it’s used for!

(the slits are so you can slip it together to stand up)