I am interested in how you all feel about this. I never really gave it much thought; I mean, in my family, if you wanted a recipe for something, you asked and it was given. I had heard of people who don’t give out their recipes, but I think I didn’t really believe these people existed – like, that was just in sitcoms or something! I mean, what’s the big deal, right?
Okay, for the sake of argument, I can see if you are some famous chef with a restaurant and your livelihood depends on people paying to come eat your meals that you have painstakingly created, maybe you shouldn’t give out your recipes. Although there will always be people like me who’d rather pay to eat in your restaurant than cook it myself. Not to mention some people can’t cook worth a crap (see: me) so they wouldn’t be able to make it good anyhow…
I have to admit (see above) I can’t cook. I can bake; in fact I am pretty darn good at it. I make great cookies and pretty good other dessert-y stuff. I can even do really well at some breakfast stuff like pancakes and french toast, because that’s actually more like baking. But I can’t make a meal decently. My idea of a good home cooked meal for my family is grilled cheese sandwiches with tomato soup, or maybe spaghetti with jar sauce. Yeah, I’m lame. And I’m okay with that. Actually, my piece de resistance is “Dinner in a Pumpkin” and it’s that time of year, isn’t it?! Anyway, even though baking is my “thing” I will share any cookie recipe you ask me for, and I will even give you hints or suggestions that have helped me make that recipe better. I have a friend who is a fabulous chef, who is from another country. If you ask her for a recipe, she will not only agree to share, but she’ll invite you over to eat so she can show you exactly how to prepare that particular dish!
So, fast forward to today. We had a big extended-family get together, and it turns out that one of my relatives (married into the family, not born into) refuses to share recipes. With anyone. Not even family. Not even with her mother-in-law, who is a pretty good cook and is apparently pretty annoyed with the situation! I asked her to explain her reasons, because I seriously can’t understand why you wouldn’t share. Basically she said because they are her recipes, (like they got passed down from her grandma, I guess not out of a cookbook, altho I am guessing granny got them out of a cookbook at some point… she admitted she doesn’t really know. I mean, reeeeally) and she doesn’t want anyone else to be able to make her special stuff. Because then she wouldn’t be the one making the special stuff. Or, because they’d make it wrong then feed it to her when she came over and she’d be disappointed in it. Something like that. Honestly, it just sounded really – selfish. Or, as another family member put it – “Geez, you’re like a little kid sitting in a corner with all your toys hidden behind you, who wants to play with the other kids’ toys but just yells “MINE” when anyone wants to play with yours.” Lol. Exactly!
So, what about you? Do you share, or not? If not, why not? Can you give me a better reason than selfishness?
(I stole this pic off the internet. I give credit to – whomever credit is due. Thank you.)
Mama's Midlife Mire 
Maybe she just wants to feel special, or it could be symptomatic of the narcissistic generation coming on. Oh, well.
I think it’s that “feeling special’ bit. Or that she’s from the south. ‘Cause we’re all westerners. So that’s different. 🙂
But I lived in Atlantic for 3 years, and folks there would give you the shirt off your back to prove that they are hospitable! That is, as long as you weren’t from NY! 🙂
Yeah, since they aren’t mine, I give out any that someone asks for…….then maybe next time, I don’t have to do the cooking!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hmm… maybe that’s why I share – in hopes that someone else will cook it the next time and I can just enjoy, effort-free, lol!!
I do share my recipes when I’m asked to. I take it as a compliment! Takes all kinds to make the world go round huh? Glad to see you back posting Ann!
Yeah, that’s how I feel – if someone asks for my recipe, that means they enjoyed what I made! I like to share…. people are just – funny, I guess!
Absolutely share – but I rarely cook from a recipe! It’s a “feeling” thing.
I don’t think this is something to be upset over. Everyone has their quirks. I guess it is nice to have some things, e.g. recipes, that are your very own:)
Oh, I am not upset about it at all! I just found it – interesting. Weird. Funny. Whatever. I can’t relate to it, at all, but it doesn’t upset me. I just wondered if others, who don’t share, could explain how they feel, because it just doesn’t make sense to me, to hold those things tight and not share. But, hey, to each his own!
I’m glad you are not letting it get to you. I remember a time in my life when I might have let it get to me.
I guess I have too much other stress in my life right now, lol. Don’t have the emotional where-with-all to let the little stuff get to me!