A few screws loose

I am going to try to keep this brief, as I really should be cleaning.  That’s my life’s refrain, isn’t it?  "I should be cleaning."   sigh   Well, the trip was fantastic…we had a really good time.  Especially on Saturday, when we went into Washington DC.  I was SO excited!  When you’ve always lived on the West Coast, (and never been rolling in ‘vacation’ money) it’s a place you aren’t sure you will ever get to visit.  Alan, even though he grew up right by there, had never visited either.  (His dad, each and every summer, would take a circuitous route to avoid DC as they passed by on their way to visit family!  He "hates crowds".  Geez.)  Anyway, we were sooo excited – as we drove down the road we were pointing out things like "Wow, there’s the Commerce Department!  Hey, it’s the Federal Reserve!  Oh, look, the Department of the Treasury!!"  At each of these little outbursts, Kiki would have this blank look on her face…finally, she had to ask "What’s the big deal?  They look like regular buildings to me."  Poor thing, she’s not studied US Govt. in school yet, so all this meant nothing to her!  She did get excited once we’d parked and begun walking around, as we visited the Smithsonian, Washington Monument, the Lincoln Memorial, and stood outside of the White House fence!  We even saw the Presidential helicoptor land on the lawn and then take off again, altho at this point we were pretty far down the mall, so we didn’t actually see the president get on board or anything.  I’d love to post some pictures, but Kiki promptly broke my computer when we got home, so I’m doing this elsewhere…. again, a big sigh.  I even know a guy who would come fix it pretty cheap, but the house is far too bad to have anyone over… so who knows how long I’ll be without my computer.  Alan and I have been at each other’s throats a bit since we’ve been apart again…. well, first, let me finish on the trip….. I think I feel better and worse about moving all at the same time.  I like it there, it’s pretty and I think it will be so cool to go and do all there is to experience there.  I am a little scared, because it’s so big and populous, and I worry about crime and stuff (nothing much too bad ever happens in our little area here).  I worry about living in the very small apartment that will be our home for at least a year… it adds yet another layer to the stress of moving, as I will have to be thinking, as I am packing, about what we’ll live with and what will have to be stored…. ugh.  It also hit me – on the long trip home – how very far away it is from my family and friends here.  I’m sad about that.   And then, on getting home…. it’s hit me again how much, much work I have to do, and I think I am dealing with still a bit of depression as I am really struggling to do anything besides curl up in a ball and cry.  Which, really, isn’t very helpful!   The problem with Alan is that he has no clue how bad it is here… you’d think after all the years we’ve been married he’d get what a mess I am, but he doesn’t… this morning he was lecturing me on "how could it possibly be that bad??" and how I needed to get off Kiki’s case about stuff…. cause that kind of conversation is really helpful, thanks!  Kiki is really struggling in school, and that is bugging me… because it is due to laziness, not that she can’t do it.  My straight-A student is getting C’s and D’s because she simply doesn’t do stuff.  All because I haven’t had time to just sit and make her do her work.  Aaargh.  It seems to me at 11 years old and in 5th grade she should be a little more self-motivated and self-disciplined… of course, I’m one to talk… good thing I’m not being graded on my perfomance!  She’s too much like me – poor kid.
Well, I’m going off to tackle my bedroom…. "One Day at a Time";  isn’t that the addict’s prayer?  I’m a mess-addict….."Hello, I’m Ann, and I’m a slobaholic….."

6 responses »

  1. I can so relate! I am avoiding cleaning off my desk right now…..Moving will bring you driving distance (granted 8 hours) to me. 🙂 When you have a chance, check out flylady.net She has loads of helpful ideas. As to the child getting C\’s and D\’s….I have one of theose, also. And she is doing poorly for the exact same reason….simply not doing the work. I have started to do some things with her verbally. I have found that decreasing the writing load has helped, and that she knows much more than she writes down. Be blessed today.

  2. I wish I could be there with you and teach you how to mercilessly (sp.?) throw things away or give them away! I really wish I could help. How\’s about a prayer? THAT I can do! hugs, g

  3. I thoroughly enjoyed catching up with your blogs and pictures. This last blog and picture from the Potomac made me completely homesick for family and friends…lol. This means I will be calling there this evening. Be sure to find a good long distance plan once you move. V*r*son had a great one when we lived in VA.If you act as if you are already living in that smaller space, by packing away everything you won\’t be able to use then…now… and have Kiki make choices… and do the same with her own things…you will cut down tremendously on the clutter. Your house will also be in great "show"position, looking more spacious, while being easier to care for. When we (the one son left still at home and the kitties) moved from the home my EX and I owned for 25 years (you can imagine the clutter)…we did that. Once you get started sorting what goes to family, friends, Christian and Veteran organizations, a selection of clothes to mix, match, and wear, favorite books, music and personal treasures, it get easier. You see what is most important and how the extra clutter just weighs you down. It will help you to be more organized and relieve stress because there will be less to deal with. Once you move…you will have already made a major adjustment.I know you have already been doing much of this, in certain areas, from the pictures and blogs, a while back. I can well believe that all this change and stress contributes to why Kiki isn\’t concentrating. Getting that out of the way may help her to be able to focus better and you can catch up on certain subjects once that is not an issue. There may be more fun and creativity about it too. Thank you for your recent visit, comment, and prayers. They are much appreciated, Ann.

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