I went to my doctor’s today. (if you’re the "oh that’s gross – TMI" sort, don’t read on) I needed to (wanted to?) have some little growths – skin tabs – removed. I know, how gross. I had quite a few and was just fed up with them. Not to mention the lovely, squiggly wart inside my nose… for all the world looking like I was constantly hangin’ a boog…!! That one, the doctor tried to talk me out of…. too many blood vessels in the nose, too many bacterium…. I just said – I’m willing to risk it to have a ‘clean’ nose! Jiminy, it hurt like crazy! Some she just cut off with scissors without any anesthesia (and I could have done that at home for free!!) A few, including the nose, she jabbed me with a needle first – and I am pretty sure that hurt even worse! And some of the liquid went right on up into my sinuses, which was very nice, I assure you. So now I have about 26 bandaids all over my upper bod. Kiki asked me (typical little girl query) "ooh, mom, did they have to see your bra??" Because, of course, what would be more humiliating in a "tweens" mind? You should have seen the look on her face – and heard the following hysterical laughter – when I told her "well, no, honey – I actually had to take my bra off so they saw everything"!!! Oh-my-gosh it was soo funny! It’s a good thing that I am no longer easily embarrassed… which I think comes from having a baby – you know, you’re in there and everybody and his brother is coming in, checking it out…. doctors, nurses, students, janitors (okay, maybe not). Because twice today, I’m sitting there in my skin and a large napkin while the nurse runs out to do – I don’t know what – and leaves the door open…. and other patients walk by…. I’m just like "Whatever. They’ll be sorry they looked, lol."
Which brings me to being busted. I asked my doctor what causes these stupid little skin growths. She said it is quite often because your body isn’t properly processing sugar (as in, diabetes). Obviously I am a prime candidate for that right now. I am a total sugarholic, although I didn’t tell her that. She asked, when was the last time I had blood work? I say, Oh, probably last year. She looks at my chart… 2005. Okay, maybe not last year. She looks at my results from back then and –
she says "your cholesterol was terrible! Are you still on your – I don’t remember the name of the drug I’d been taking – "
and I was like, "uhm….no. "
she asks "Why not?!"
I say," uhm…I don’t know."
I’m sure she thinks I am one of the stupidest patients she has. In my head, I was trying to remember why. I think we’d gone on one of our healthy eating stints and I figured I could fix it the right way instead of with drugs. Then we fell back into our wicked ways, but by then Alan had changed jobs so we had no insurance. And then… well, time just gets away with me. I suppose it is by the grace of God I haven’t had a heart attack. Don’t tell Kiki; she’s such a worry-wart! So, later on this week I am going in for bloodwork. Sigh. I can only imagine the tongue lashing I am in for. Serves me right I suppose.