What the heck..?

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I wish I knew what my problem is.  Seriously.  Something is wrong with my head.  Alan was just saying yesterday, "what’s going on with you?  In all our years of marriage, you’ve never been this bad of a housekeeper.  What is it?"  Well, I wish I knew, bucky….some serious lack of caring?  Extreme tiredness?  A rebellious attitude?  Mental distress?  Honestly, it is a concern…. and I don’t know.  I try, but then get overwhelmed and just give up.  It often seems like Kiki is trashing the space behind me faster than I am cleaning, so I can’t get ahead.  And yeah, I’ve tried to make her change, as well…..works about as good as changing myself.   And once in a blue moon, Alan will help….but those times are so few and far between that it doesn’t really add up to much.   You know what I want to do?  Nothing. Nothing at all.  Lie on my lounge chair and soak up the sun.  With NO ONE talking to me.  Absolute silence.  I really want a vacation ~ from my life.  From myself, even.  How do I accomplish that?? 
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8 responses »

  1. When you figure out the key to becoming a better housekeeper, let me know.  I HATE housework.  I would rather do anything or nothing at all, before cleaning house.  Oh and it is a good thing that I read your blog this morning.  It reminded me to take my medicine.  Maybe – just maybe the medicine will help me with my funk.  Or maybe it will relax me so much that I won\’t even feel distressed about the housework.  Of course Craig will be distressed and riding my case, but if the medicine works real well – that won\’t even phase me.  Hope you have a good week.
    Kathleen

  2. I understand the struggle. I\’ve gotten so tired of cleaning after ungrateful children who are slobs, and tired of fighting them to do it, I quit, they quit, its awful. So I decided that if you don\’t clean, you don\’t eat. They will only get oatmeal for breakfast and pb&J for meals, one fruit and some carrots for snacks. One glass of milk a day. And they can\’t use my electricity or my hot water for bathing. So no tv, no computer, no radios, no fans, no hot water, and no good food or sugary drinks. Unless they work.
    And since its Biblical to work for your food/pay, they couldn\’t see that it was unfair. So they want a new chore list/chart so they can get busy.
    We are also going to go through the house and garage and yard sale a ton of stuff and then get rid of what doesn\’t sell, because too much clutter makes things hard to clean.

  3. I know that when my house has gotten really out of control before it is hard for me to see a light at the end of the tunnel and want to clean.  I notice though that once I start, and I really push myself, a clean house makes me feel so much better.  Now I am really working on keeping it super clean by doing some everyday.  Of course it helps that we are trying to sell it and have to keep it clean for perspective buyers, but I really love this feeling.  It almost makes me not want to sell it suddenly.
     
    Do you think part of your problem may be some sort of distress, ie depression?  I used to work in the mental health field and some of the signs you are relaying are pointing that way.  Maybe I\’m completely off base, but maybe you should talk to your doctor.  Stress can sure bring that on!
     
    Take care of yourself,
    Amy

  4. Hi Ann,
    I think you NEED to get a place where you can have a horse.  It just seems that would lift some weight.  Nature always helps when I am stressed.  Have you been to Lisa\’s space?  http://www.lisa00785bigmama.spaces/live.com
    You have some beautiful new pictures too.  Love the flowers.
    I am feeling moved to pray for circumstances that will allow the horse you are dreaming about to become a reality and come into your life.  Remember, God answers in abundance!
    Hugs…

  5. Not that I know squat about anything medically, but your description sounds like depression to me. I (kindly) suggest seeing your doctor and describing your symptoms. S/he may be able to help you with your funk.
     
    I too hate housework and get frustrated with the kids trashing the house, but what you describe sounds like more than frustration.

  6. There\’s this thing about the end of the year where everyone gets tired and feeling like they are running the last leg of the race.  You know, when your legs feel like lead!?  I\’m praying that God would raise you up, that you would find joy.  I stop by here often to see what you\’re up to but I haven\’t been able to comment…something worked today though.
     
    Have a relaxing Memorial Day Weekend…pray that God gives you a day of smiles and laughter and JOY!
     
    Cheryl…fromthebellyofthewhale

  7. There\’s this thing about the end of the year where everyone gets tired and feeling like they are running the last leg of the race.  You know, when your legs feel like lead!?  I\’m praying that God would raise you up, that you would find joy.  I stop by here often to see what you\’re up to but I haven\’t been able to comment…something worked today though.
     
    Have a relaxing Memorial Day Weekend…pray that God gives you a day of smiles and laughter and JOY!
     
    Cheryl…fromthebellyofthewhale

  8. There\’s this thing about the end of the year where everyone gets tired and feeling like they are running the last leg of the race.  You know, when your legs feel like lead!?  I\’m praying that God would raise you up, that you would find joy.  I stop by here often to see what you\’re up to but I haven\’t been able to comment…something worked today though.
     
    Have a relaxing Memorial Day Weekend…pray that God gives you a day of smiles and laughter and JOY!
     
    Cheryl…fromthebellyofthewhale

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